Weekly Update.

– Boxing: David Haye should be banned from boxing after his horrendous attempt against Wladimir Klitschko. Klitschko dominated Haye to a unanimous decision while Haye bitched about a broken pinky toe. There should be better boxing this weekend when Paul Williams takes on Erislandy Lara on HBO. Oh, and Ricky Hatton retired, according to ESPN.

– Slow motion for me, slow motion for me: I’m sure there is something that looks awful in slow motion, but I have yet to see it. Here’s some water:

And here’s a tank shooting some shit:

Lovely.  (water, Geekologie; tank, Gizmodo)

– King me: Not sure how long this game of checkers would last, but you gotta like the concept:  (Core77)

– You are not a hologram: Some really smart people think we are just a hologram (click here to have Wikipedia explain it better than I can). New studies show those really smart people might be wrong.

– Idle Hands: Wanna play guitar, but you don’t want to actually learn how? Then just electrocute yourself. Well, not really, but this device sends electric currents into your hand to bend your fingers properly.  (New Scientist)

– Speaking of idle hands: Yeah, she’s nice:  (Fuck Yeah Brazilian Girls)

– Taxes and the NBA: There’s a correlation between state income taxes and success in the NBA. It’s too small of a sample size to give it any weight, but you gamblers should take note that for seven straight years a team from one of the ten lowest taxed cities made the finals.  (Carpe Diem)

– Is that a megaphone in your pants or are you just happy to see me? The world’s loudest animal uses its penis to make its noise.  (Discovery)

– “That ether, that shit that makes your soul burn slow”: Complex has “The 50 Best Hip-Hop Diss Songs“, but I have a hard time agreeing with their first choice (Jay-Z’s “Takeover”). Nas’ response to “Takeover” was “Ether” (number 3), which is a term rappers now use when someone shits on someone else and I think the debate over who won the Nas/Jay-Z beef is still ongoing. Complex’s second choice, “Hit ‘Em Up” by 2Pac, resulted in the deaths of, arguably, hip-hops two greatest rappers.  (The Daily What)

– The history of contacts: Yeah, as I write this I realize it’s probably not that interesting, but people used to stick pieces of glass onto their eyes (it covered even the whites) back in the 1880s.  (Gizmodo)

– Coffee may ward off Alzheimer’s: The mice were drinking the equivalence of four to five cups of coffee a day, but still, those on coffee showed better resistance to Alzheimer’s than those drinking decaf.  (Discovery)

– How’d you spend the Fourth? I bet you didn’t release paper lanterns into the air like the Polish:  (Core77)

– Got to pass a drug test? Here’s how (lots and lots and lots of water. Oh, and some vitamins so your piss ain’t clear).  (The World’s Best Ever)

– Radiohead: If you like the band Radiohead, you should have OK Computer and In Rainbows. If you really like Radiohead, you’d put those albums together to create the “hidden” Radiohead album. Start with the first song from OK Computer, then put on the first song from In Rainbows, then keep doing that until you get to “Karma Police”. Ta-da. Hidden album. Learn more tricks from Radiohead and other bands here. (Cracked)

– The Marks’ Financial Update:

  • MFL – Mr. Lee, the second Mark to wed, made like rolling hills as he worked his stock up to $13.58, from $13.25 on June 12th. Investors gave Mark a little scare on the three trading days after his marriage, especially on the 27th when he dropped almost twenty cents. Still, he continues his steady climb that started back in April.
  • MAB – Bunk had a terrible July 5th, so I’m going to go ahead and assume he had a terrible July 4th. Surprisingly, he stayed positive during this time period and closed on July 7th at $13.69, up from his June 12th $13.31.
  • MDH – After deciding Harter was at his peak at Mark Lee’s wedding, investors came in on Monday selling. Seriously, you couldn’t beat the best man’s speech (at least I know I didn’t), yet Harter dropped twelve cents on the 27th, then another five cents on Tuesday. He closed July 7th at $2.87, down from his June 12th $2.94.
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