Weekly Update.

– Boxing: A lot of fights have been inked since the last post, making this a really good fight year. Here’s what has happened and what’s coming up:

• Carl Froch shut out Glen Johnson on June 4th and will now fight Andre Ward for the Super Six Championship. All you need to know about Froch is that his wife is a smokeshow:  
• Manny Pacquiao’s next opponent will be Juan Manuel Marquez in November. It’ll be the third fight for these guys, the previous two were a controversial decision for Manny and a controversial draw. Very controversial when they fight.
• Bernard Hopkins became the oldest champion in boxing history. That’s saying a lot for a sport that traces its champions back to the late 1800s.
• Paul Williams will fight the Cuban Erislandy Lara on July 9th. Two of my favorite fighters here, and I’m torn on who to root for.
• On July 2nd, Wladimir Klitschko takes on the only other heavyweight worth fighting that’s not named Klitschko in David Haye.
• Zab “Super Jew” Judah is set to fight Amir Khan on July 23rd. Zab is making a weird little comeback here and he should keep this fight entertaining.
• And finally, “Pretty Boy” Floyd “Money” Mayweather, Jr, has announced that he will star in another 24/7. Oh, and he’ll fight Victor Ortiz on September 17th. To say I was excited to hear this is an understatement. (For those bitching about not fighting Pacquiao, Floyd hasn’t fought in over 16 months, let him warm up first. Many think it’s telling that he’s fighting a southpaw here.)

– Plax was wearing jeans: We all think Plaxico was wearing sweatpants when he shot himself. Turns out, he wasn’t.  (Deadspin)

– Smell like roasted pig: Love BBQs? Want to smell like one? Try this cologne.  (Gizmodo)

– Make like a tree and leave: When you die, you can put your ashes in a “Bios Urn” and then plant it. Rather, your loved ones can put your ashes in the urn and plant it. Would be kinda weird if you could plant your own ashes.  (Discovery)

– The friendly skies: Puyehue volcano erupted in Chile and a lot of people passed along this picture:

And that is a good one. However, my recent fascination with volcano lightning makes me like this one even more:

Both make it look like the world is ending though.  (New Scientist)

– Double penis lizard: Scientist recently discovered a lizard that has two dicks.  (Boing Boing)

– Whiskey holster: Because how else are you supposed to carry your drink?  (Ces)

– Best places to photograph: Here’s a list of the “25 Best Places to Photograph on Planet Earth” and it starts with Angkor Wat:  (PopSci)

– Help kill the planet: This video discusses the environmental impact of videos online. I just hit play and let it run without watching. Again and again: (Gizmodo)

– Form fitting bras: They map your tits in 3-D and then print out a bra specifically for them. Custom bras:  (Discovery)

– Titty City: I’ve never heard of this magazine, but turns out there is a new one published. Pick one up here. And this is what the cover looks like:  (The World’s Best Ever)

– Overkill: The U.S. Department of Education issued a search warrant and called in the S.W.A.T. team to find Kenneth Wright’s estranged wife, who had defaulted on student loans. The DOE says it was a criminal fraud case, so clearly sending the S.W.A.T. in on Mr. Wright and his three children (ages 3, 7, and 11) was completely necessary. No, you guys are right. We should definitely let the government handle all loans.  (Coyote Blog)

– Abstinence panties: Because telling a man that you don’t want to fuck sometimes isn’t enough, you need to let him see that you don’t want his penis inside you:  (Geekologie)

– Futuristic water gun: Xploderz is the name, but I’m really confused on what’s going on here. You can grow the ammo? Whatever:  (Gizmodo)

– Black market website: Want some LSD? Or any other drug for that matter? Do you also not want to leave your home? Then try this website, which I would link to if I could, that sells everything.  (Gawker)

– Telepathic dogs: Because how else would they know how to manipulate humans?  (Discovery)

– Crazy sky: This is a panoramic view of Australia Day in Perth, Australia and it was taken by Antti Kemppainen.  (Gizmodo)

– Concrete ping pong table: Noe Pond Club had outdoor ping pong tables that got so hot you could fry fish on them… or so I heard. This table looks cool (literally and figuratively) and is made of concrete. Get yours here:  (Core77)

– Light paintings: These photos seem like a recent craze. To pull them off you need a camera with a long exposure and a laser pointer. Point light at camera in whatever design you want, and you can get something like this:  (Hongkiat)

– “All the woman be at Wal-Mart, ya heard”: Just a fantastic song and video:  (The World’s Best Ever)

– Move it like Bernie: Who would have thought an 80s movie about a dead boss would inspire a dance craze. And if you’re wondering, Molly is the Queen of the Bernie and taught me well:  (Molly)

– The Marks Financial Update:

• MDH – Harter was relatively flat over the last thirty days, closing at $2.94, down ten cents from the last time I posted an update. I’m lucky I don’t have a stock tied to my name, my shit would be bankrupt after my poor performance this past month. Seems like investors are just biding time for now with Harter.
• MAB – Bunk became Mr. Bunker and so far investors don’t give a shit. In fact, he started slipping directly after the wedding, then popped up to $13.49 on June 2nd. Of course, investors realized Bunk was coming to Mark Lee’s bachelor party weekend and sold accordingly. Bunk now stands at $13.31, seven cents more than when he was just a fiancé.
• MFL – Mark Lee is down since the last time we checked in. Investors sold him in the lead up to his bachelor party, but when they came back on Monday and found out that Mark Lee was reviving the “Enough is Enough” campaign and running for mayor of Hoboken, well, how could they not bid him up? He hit $13.39 before investors sobered up and he fell to $13.25, down seventeen cents since last month.