Monthly Archives: June 2011

Weekly Update.

– Boxing: July 2nd starts a string of “fights you should try to watch”, starting with Klitschko/Haye (heavyweights), followed by Paul Williams/Erislandy Lara (junior middleweights) on the 9th, and finally Judah/Khan (junior welterweights) on the 23rd. That Klitschko fight is the only heavyweight fight that’s mattered since Lewis/Tyson. (I just slashed the shit out of you.)

– Naked in Nature: The World’s Best Ever has 30 pictures from Playboy for you, but here’s a taste:  (The World’s Best Ever)

– Speaking of tits: The Big Book of Breasts is now in 3-D.  (Coyote Blog)

– That cool, refreshing drink: Kids near the U.S. Open last weekend tried to open a lemonade stand. The county tried to fine them $500 for violating the vendor laws. The county dropped the fine and made the kids move to a side street. Because government is caring.  (Carpe Diem)

– Tattoos and suicide: If you are getting a tattoo, don’t get one that references Ned Kelly. You’re more likely to die from suicide or homicide than the average person.  (Discovery)

– Who the fuck is Ned Kelly? Depending on who you ask, he’s either just an Australian outlaw from the late 1800s or a symbol for the fight against British rule in Australia. He also made his own set of armor before taking on some cops.  Anyway, don’t get his tattoo unless you want to die young.  (Wiki)

 – “Don’t forget to pee the plants”: No, my mom has never left me that note. Hopefully she will, one day. This is merely a concept, but one can wish:  (Gizmodo)

– I need to watch more reality TV: Her name is Diana Balsini and she was a contestant (guest?) on Big Brother Brazil. I’m in love, even if that love is covered in Photoshop (seriously, compare this picture to the one above):  (Fuck Yeah Brazilian Girls)

– Tape art: Pictures created with electrical tape:  (Core77)

– Refs suck: And apparently have for over 1,800 years. Turns out an epitaph for a gladiator in Roman times blames the fighter’s loss (and subsequent death) on a poor ruling by the referee. The gladiator thought he had won the battle when he knocked his opponent to the ground and the opponent asked for mercy. Instead the ref ruled it an inadvertent slip and told them to keep fighting.  (Discovery)

– Plastic money: Oh, Canada. Instead of paper-cotton money, they are rolling out polymer bills come the fall, starting with $100, or whatever money sign they use up dere.  (Geekologie)

– Data: This is data, or so they claim:  (Core77)

– Mind, blown: Astronomers found a protostar that is (I guess was, since it’s 750 light years away) spewing jets of water into space. This could mean that our Sun went through the same process during its formation… which could mean our water isn’t from this planet. And, since water breeds life, that there is a lot more water and a lot more life out there than originally thought.  (PopSci)

– Space pic: Since it’s been awhile (bigger version here). It’s two galaxies crashing into each other, if you couldn’t tell:  (PopSci)

– Shit burger: Ugh. But yeah. So a scientist in Japan (of course) has found a way to extract protein from “sewage mud” to make meat. The video is worth watching since he actually labels the meat in his plastic bag as “shit burger” and then uses a creepy finger pointer at the end:  (Kornfeld)

– Texas in this motherfucka’: You’ll still be able to manufacture and sell 100-watt lightbulbs, assuming you do both in Texas, no matter what the federal government says. Pretty badass of Texas, but should I expect anything less?  (Carpe Diem)

– Smoke ’em if you got ’em: Enjoy your cigarettes with these new pictures on them:  (MarketWatch)

– Dust: Harter had asked me to put something about dust in an update, however I think I’m like 4 weeks late from when he originally asked. For the most part, it seems like your common house dust is made up of dust mites and dust mites’ shit. At least according to Wiki:

[House dust mites] excrete enzymes to digest the organic particles, and excrete feces, that together become part of the house dust, and may irritate allergies

The rest of the dust around us basically comes from any loose soil that wind travels over. The Sahara, for one, is dusting this shit out of shit. Even housing developments create dust, either when cutting wood like a lumberjack or moving earth for the foundation (just to get a base). Hair (human and animal), plant pollen, minerals, skin, and a bunch of other nasty shit make up dust.

– One more time: Ending with a picture of disgusting lungs and a piece about how you breath in the shit of dust mites every second, I figured we’d show my new wife one more time:  (Fuck Yeah Brazilian Girls)

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Weekly Update.

– Boxing: A lot of fights have been inked since the last post, making this a really good fight year. Here’s what has happened and what’s coming up:

  • Carl Froch shut out Glen Johnson on June 4th and will now fight Andre Ward for the Super Six Championship. All you need to know about Froch is that his wife is a smokeshow:  
  • Manny Pacquiao’s next opponent will be Juan Manuel Marquez in November. It’ll be the third fight for these guys, the previous two were a controversial decision for Manny and a controversial draw. Very controversial when they fight.
  • Bernard Hopkins became the oldest champion in boxing history. That’s saying a lot for a sport that traces its champions back to the late 1800s.
  • Paul Williams will fight the Cuban Erislandy Lara on July 9th. Two of my favorite fighters here, and I’m torn on who to root for.
  • On July 2nd, Wladimir Klitschko takes on the only other heavyweight worth fighting that’s not named Klitschko in David Haye.
  • Zab “Super Jew” Judah is set to fight Amir Khan on July 23rd. Zab is making a weird little comeback here and he should keep this fight entertaining.
  • And finally, “Pretty Boy” Floyd “Money” Mayweather, Jr, has announced that he will star in another 24/7. Oh, and he’ll fight Victor Ortiz on September 17th. To say I was excited to hear this is an understatement. (For those bitching about not fighting Pacquiao, Floyd hasn’t fought in over 16 months, let him warm up first. Many think it’s telling that he’s fighting a southpaw here.)

– Plax was wearing jeans: We all think Plaxico was wearing sweatpants when he shot himself. Turns out, he wasn’t.  (Deadspin)

– Smell like roasted pig: Love BBQs? Want to smell like one? Try this cologne.  (Gizmodo)

– Make like a tree and leave: When you die, you can put your ashes in a “Bios Urn” and then plant it. Rather, your loved ones can put your ashes in the urn and plant it. Would be kinda weird if you could plant your own ashes.  (Discovery)

– The friendly skies: Puyehue volcano erupted in Chile and a lot of people passed along this picture:

And that is a good one. However, my recent fascination with volcano lightning makes me like this one even more:

Both make it look like the world is ending though.  (New Scientist)

– Double penis lizard: Scientist recently discovered a lizard that has two dicks.  (Boing Boing)

– Whiskey holster: Because how else are you supposed to carry your drink?  (Ces)

– Best places to photograph: Here’s a list of the “25 Best Places to Photograph on Planet Earth” and it starts with Angkor Wat:  (PopSci)

– Help kill the planet: This video discusses the environmental impact of videos online. I just hit play and let it run without watching. Again and again: (Gizmodo)

– Form fitting bras: They map your tits in 3-D and then print out a bra specifically for them. Custom bras:  (Discovery)

– Titty City: I’ve never heard of this magazine, but turns out there is a new one published. Pick one up here. And this is what the cover looks like:  (The World’s Best Ever)

– Overkill: The U.S. Department of Education issued a search warrant and called in the S.W.A.T. team to find Kenneth Wright’s estranged wife, who had defaulted on student loans. The DOE says it was a criminal fraud case, so clearly sending the S.W.A.T. in on Mr. Wright and his three children (ages 3, 7, and 11) was completely necessary. No, you guys are right. We should definitely let the government handle all loans.  (Coyote Blog)

– Abstinence panties: Because telling a man that you don’t want to fuck sometimes isn’t enough, you need to let him see that you don’t want his penis inside you:  (Geekologie)

– Futuristic water gun: Xploderz is the name, but I’m really confused on what’s going on here. You can grow the ammo? Whatever:  (Gizmodo)

– Black market website: Want some LSD? Or any other drug for that matter? Do you also not want to leave your home? Then try this website, which I would link to if I could, that sells everything.  (Gawker)

– Telepathic dogs: Because how else would they know how to manipulate humans?  (Discovery)

– Crazy sky: This is a panoramic view of Australia Day in Perth, Australia and it was taken by Antti Kemppainen.  (Gizmodo)

– Concrete ping pong table: Noe Pond Club had outdoor ping pong tables that got so hot you could fry fish on them… or so I heard. This table looks cool (literally and figuratively) and is made of concrete. Get yours here:  (Core77)

– Light paintings: These photos seem like a recent craze. To pull them off you need a camera with a long exposure and a laser pointer. Point light at camera in whatever design you want, and you can get something like this:  (Hongkiat)

– “All the woman be at Wal-Mart, ya heard”: Just a fantastic song and video:  (The World’s Best Ever)

– Move it like Bernie: Who would have thought an 80s movie about a dead boss would inspire a dance craze. And if you’re wondering, Molly is the Queen of the Bernie and taught me well:  (Molly)

– The Marks Financial Update:

  • MDH – Harter was relatively flat over the last thirty days, closing at $2.94, down ten cents from the last time I posted an update. I’m lucky I don’t have a stock tied to my name, my shit would be bankrupt after my poor performance this past month. Seems like investors are just biding time for now with Harter.
  • MAB – Bunk became Mr. Bunker and so far investors don’t give a shit. In fact, he started slipping directly after the wedding, then popped up to $13.49 on June 2nd. Of course, investors realized Bunk was coming to Mark Lee’s bachelor party weekend and sold accordingly. Bunk now stands at $13.31, seven cents more than when he was just a fiancé.
  • MFL – Mark Lee is down since the last time we checked in. Investors sold him in the lead up to his bachelor party, but when they came back on Monday and found out that Mark Lee was reviving the “Enough is Enough” campaign and running for mayor of Hoboken, well, how could they not bid him up? He hit $13.39 before investors sobered up and he fell to $13.25, down seventeen cents since last month.

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