Weekly Update.

(WARNING: No naked chicks below.)

– Boxing: It’s rumored that Floyd Mayweather Jr asked for $100 million to fight Manny Pacquiao. This is according to Bob Arum, who’s a lying cunt, so who knows the veracity of this, but worth noting. Other than that we have a solid lineup of fights in April starting with Erik Morales vs Marcos Maidana on the 9th (HBO PPV), with a Robert Guerrero vs Michael Katsidis undercard, followed the next week by Andre Berto and Victor Ortiz getting it on, no homo, on regular HBO. That should hold us over until May 7th when Manny Pacquaio fights old man Mosley.

– Wooden jerseys: Some dude in Rhode Island makes uniforms out of wood. He’s done the Celtics and the Patriots, including sneakers (for Celts) and a helmet (for Pats, duh). Looking at the finished product it’s hard to tell that it is in fact wood, but it is.  (Uni Watch)

– Futbol: In case you care, the US Soccer team has leaked its third jersey:  (Uni Watch)

– Looking for a condo? Want to move to Australia? Here, watch this and then I bet you’ll want to:  (Ces)

– As I slooshied, I knew such lovely pictures: So Stanley Kubrick was a pretty damn good photographer before being a pretty damn good director. I love the contrast between these two pics:  (Coyote Blog)

– Huntin’ wabbits: Don’t you hate when deer see your beer belt and run away before you can shoot Bambi in the face? Me too. That’s why you need the camouflage beer belt:  (Ces)

– Cliffhanger: Want to be the best rock climber? First off, you’re gonna need to remove your feet and add some goat hooves… seriously. And then you should pick up this knife designed by a rock climber:  (goats, Core77; knife, Gizmodo)

Which should make you ready to climb Everest, with a nice gay rainbow for you:  (The World’s Best Ever)

– Yeah, so not creepy: If you’d like a quilt made of woman’s underwear, then you should contact this guy: (The World’s Best)

– $50,000 Formula 1 steering wheel: The best quote on this wheel is from Nick Heidfeld, driver for the Lotus Renault team, who says “the fuck-up potential is extremely high”. Here’s what it looks like:

And here’s what the drivers can do with it:  (Gizmodo)

Buttons and toggle switches control on-off functions, from this year’s adjustable rear wing to engaging neutral gear. The dials can be used to vary torque, differentials, brakes, clutches, engine rev limits and anything else a team can dream up. The display on top relays shifting point alerts and messages from race managers, and if the drivers need to hydrate while in the cockpit, they can even control their in-helmet beverage system with the “drink” button.The revival of the KERS hybrid system has also added a button and dial back to the controls — and FIA also only allows the adjustable rear wing to be deployed in certain places along the track.

– Sweet drawing: Right?

Wrong. It’s stitching.  (Core77)

– Improve your cellphone signal: At least if it’s a smartphone. Just put it in a glass.  (Lifehacker)

– The beautiful game: I haven’t played foosball since Money and I were running shit in college, but this has to be the nicest foosball table I’ve ever seen:  (Engadget)

– “Andrew Myers Screws People to Make Portraits”: That’s the headline Core77 decided to run with for this piece of art made up of screws:  (Core77)

– The Marks Financial Update: I’m still doing this? Hells yeah. So what if it’s been a month… fuck, I am lazy.

  • MFL – Mark Lee had a solid gain from March 11th to March 28th when he went from $12.50 to a high of $13.08, then investors remembered that GiGi (GeeGee? GG? G-G? Jee Jee?) will soon be coming to take her condo back. That’s why he closed the month at $12.85, which is up from his March 4th close of $12.61, but clearly down from his high (stoner).
  • MDH – Harter had a slow month, just moving from $2.67 down to $2.54, but of course he had to have some fun between those days. It’s not just Molly that loves Harter on payday, investors also showed him love by bumping him up from $2.55 to $2.75 on March 15th. Alas, he couldn’t hang on started his decline the next day.
  • MAB – Bunk gradually declined from his March 4th close of $13.50 down to $12.66 to finish March like a slaughtered lamb. He did go six days were he stayed within three cents of $13, so that was really exciting. Or not. Very not. Anyway, Bunk looks to start rebounding in April, we hope.

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