Weekly Update.

(WARNING: No naked chicks below.)

– Boxing: Besides Lights Out starting up tonight (Tuesday) at 10 PM on FX, we don’t have anything until January 29th’s Timothy Bradley vs Devon Alexander fight at the Silverdome (HBO).

– The Real L Word: The first season started in late June, so I’d expect the announced second season that they are still casting would air then. (Harter summed it up best with, “you guys told me to watch it, you were like ‘this chick’s hot’, and I was like ‘eh’. Then she just ends up taking a dildo.”)

– More reasons to love hockey: If 24/7 and the silky smooth voice of Liev Schreiber haven’t gotten you watching hockey, then how about this minor league team that put two other teams’ logos on their jerseys? The Hershey Bears have the Manitoba Moose patch on their right shoulder, and a Texas Stars patch on their left. These were the teams the Bears beat in the last two Calder Cup finals. What a great “fuck you”. (Uni Watch)

– Stanley Chow: Bunk used this artist as inspiration for the banner you see today (unless today is in the future and we have a different banner up, in which case you should go to the Banner page and guess which one it is). The guy (Chow, not Bunk) does great posters, which you can buy here on his site (still Chow). Bunk (er, don’t need this one) likes this poster:

You can get all three Mad Men related posters here. The rest of the illustrations are anywhere from £15 to £40, which is like $5,323 if my math is right. (Bunk)

– Brian Farm Cinema: You should go here to watch a dope ass video that is like Planet Earth with snowboarders, skaters, and Japanese people. Just go hit play on this link. (Bardon)

– Cats don’t talk: At least that’s what lawyers for Church & Dwight (makers of Super Scoop kitty litters) are alleging as they sue Clorox (Fresh Step) over Clorox’s ads that have talking cats explain why they choose Fresh Step over other brands. (Wooten)

– Handerpants: Ever want underpants for your hands? Then you can buy them here. Or just watch this for ten seconds and move on: (Jimmy)

– Tips for women: Want to look younger? Hang with an older crowd. People underestimate the age of 30 year olds after looking at older people’s pictures, while also overestimating after looking at younger people’s pictures. Need more responses on your dating site? Then try to get polarizing reactions of your looks. Here’s Megan Fox:

The green bar represents how many 5s (hot) Megan received, the red bar how many 1s (ugly, what the fuck?). If she was on OK Cupid, she’d receive a lot of responses. More so than someone with only 4s (cute) and 5s. So remember, it’s better to be consider beautiful or ugly, then to be considered cute or beautiful. If you want attention. And women always want attention. (Seriously though, who actually thinks Megan Fox is ugly? Sad world, sometimes.) (age, Dad; looks, Gizmodo)

– One last tip: And I don’t mean my cock (ZING! I DO mean my cock. Because it’s just “a” tip). Women should avoid Terry Allen Lester, who tried to rig an exploding dildo, then give it as a Christmas present to an ex-girlfriend. You know Terry’s a winner when the best person a reporter gets a word from is the local liquor store owner: (Dad)

Lester has been a long-time customer at Lindner’s Liquor.

“I am in total shock. I could not believe it when I read it for sure. He has always been nice when he has come into the store,” Owner Tae Borne said.

– 100 Things to watch in 2011: JWT, an advertising agency, put together this report that attempts to spot trends for the new year. The intro gives their background and track record (Foursquare and coconut water were part of last year’s list), then it give its list in alphabetical order. Interesting stuff, always good to know what’s next, like the growing African middle class or Jennifer Lawrence (she’s 20) or even Rooney Mara. (Carpe Diem)

– iPad brush: If you’ve been using your iPad to paint, then you might want to get a brush for it from this site: (The World’s Best Ever)

– Armenians been drunk forever: Scientists found a wine factory (minus the automation) that is roughly 6,100 years old. (Gizmodo)

– Porn and CES: Not Cesnik, but the Consumer Electronic Show and the AVN Adult Entertainment Expo have always been intertwined. The AVN used to have a booth or two in the basement of the CES’ expo, then decided that they could make mo’ money above ground so they started their own expo and made sure to coincide with the CES for old-times’ sake. (Gearlog)

– Water sculptures: This is a cool slow-motion video of water in the air looking like sculptures: (Boing Boing)

– Interference: You can read all about the National Football League’s pass interference rules here. Unfortunately anything I say here about how defensive players can make contact with the receiver as long as they play the ball, summed up in rule (a) of what constitutes defensive interference (emphasis added):

(a) Contact by a defender who is not playing the ball and such contact restricts the receiver’s opportunity to make the catch.

will never determine if the play in question was or wasn’t pass interference. But I take exception to being told I’m out of my mind when I say that a defensive player has an equal right to the football, summed up in “note 2”:

Note 2: Defensive players have as much right to the path of the ball as eligible offensive players.

All I’m saying. I know people hate arguing with me because I don’t drop it and I act like I’m 100% right (ie a dick), but arguing those previous two points after tequila shots was frustrating. Just remember that I may suck at fantasy football, but I know my fucking football.

– Sorry: And if the above hurt anyone’s fragile feelings, here’s some Marisa Miller: