Monthly Archives: December 2010

Weekly Update.

– Boxing: Pacquiao is going to fight Shane Mosley, the same Mosley who got abused by Mayweather and should be fighting Andre Berto for the right to fight Pacquiao.  Meanwhile, Floyd Mayweather Jr has gotten in trouble with the guards to the gated community in which he livesTwice.  Here’s Floyd’s mug shot from when he stole his ex-girlfriend’s iPhone (allegedly?  Do I have to say that?):

– Knockouts: Here’s a list of top knockouts, with a bunch of honorable mentions, for 2010.  Of the ones I got to watch live, the Sergio Martinez knockout of Paul Williams was my favorite (though I hated that Williams lost).  Skip to the :46 mark to see Williams drop:  (Wooten)

– Get an iPad for Xmas? Then go read Gizmodo’s “Everything Your New iPad Needs Right Now.”  I didn’t get an iPad, but I did open Ben’s.  Hey, my mom hands me a present, I’ma open that shit.  Penny grabbed an empty box and clamped down on the gift like an alligator (picture top and bottom of box in both hands, like cymbals crashing together).  (Gizmodo)

– Keep X in Christmas: My dad pointed this out, but Wiki confirms it.  You are writing “Christmas” by writing “Xmas”, at least according to the Greeks.  And they’ve been around for awhile.  Here’s the line: “the “X” comes from the Greek letter Chi, which is the first letter of the Greek word Χριστός, translated as “Christ”.”

– Let your son have some titty: According to studies, “[b]reastfeeding improves later academic performance in boys but appears to have no such effect in girls.”  (See Toni?  Even scientists don’t put commas in front of “but”s all the time.)  So drink up, fellas!  (New Scientist)

– Real world translator: This iPhone app uses augmented reality to translate foreign languages on things you read, like signs or menus.  (If you are unsure what “augmented reality” is, it’s when you are looking through a camera lens, and random shit gets put over stuff.  So you hold your phone like taking a pic, and then things not there in real life show up on your screen.  Like the reverse of a vampire in a mirror.)  (Boing Boing)

– South Park: Hey, it was only 15 years ago when I was in Bunk’s basement and he was showing me the “Spirit of Christmas”:

15 fucking years later, I’m still wondering what would Brian Boitana do.  (The World’s Best Ever)

– Implantable chip to fight pain: Thing just straight chills on your spine to relieve you of pain when needed.  (Discovery News)

– I’ll trade you three string beans for your head of broccoli: That’s a sucker’s trade, but it could happen up in Minnesota where the St. Paul school district is outlawing “sweet, sticky, fat-laden [and] salty treats“.  And not just from being sold in vending machines or in the cafeteria, but also in packed lunches and fundraisers.  That’s right, they even want to stop bake-offs.  No cupcakes for birthdays?  Fuck you, St. Paul.  Even more fucked up is that the policy was in place for four years, but it wasn’t until a new superintendent decided to actually enforce it.  Without even seeing a pic, I’m calling the superintendent fat.  Any takers?  Here she is:

Seriously, I wrote the above before seeing a pic.  I think we should worry more about shitty teachers and outdated textbooks than if Fat Tim has a Ding Dong in his backpack.  (Reason)

– We really have it great: In 1964 it cost $750 at Sears for a color television.  If you convert that $750 into today’s dollars, you get a price tag of $5,300.  For $5,300 in 2010, you could purchase a washer, a dryer, a refrigerator, a freezer, a range, a microwave, a blender, a laptop, a GPS, a camera, a plasma HDTV, an iPod Touch, a 300-CD changer, a home theater, a Blu-Ray player, AND a TiVo.  That’s what you call ballin’ (although, I kinda question the quality of some of the items to fit it all under $5,300).  (Carpe Diem)

– Bottoms up: Literally.  This beer dispenser fills beer up from the bottom (meaning you put the cup down and then it fills up, instead of pouring it in).  Oh just watch:  (Geekologie)

– That’s grand: Republicans plan to lift the ban on electronics in the house.  (Gizmodo)

– William Morris’ wife: Not sure what the deal is with this site (William Morris’ Wife), but the guys at Kissing Suzy Kolber recommend it… and I do too.  It goes from clothed picture of Penelope Cruz to a not-so-clothed Cindy Crawford:

To a definitely-not-clothed Jenna Jameson:

To a topless Victoria Principal, who I don’t know:

– The Marks’ Financial Update:

  • MDH – Harter was slightly up from $2.23 to $2.29 this time period, the direction he should be heading into for Moonti Championship weekend.  I already helped him as much as I could by giving him Jason Witten earlier this year, so you’re welcome, Harter.  The rest is up to your vaunted defense.
  • MFL – The other half of the Moonti Cup was down from $12.59 to $12.30, which we can only blame on having the puppy killer lead his fantasy football team to glory.  Mark is going to have to root for a big performance from the dog murderer to be crowned champion.  But hey, that’s fantasy football for you: you root for players you hate.
  • MAB – Bunk has been on a vicious slump since November 11th’s $14.69.  He now stands at $12.99, down for this period from $13.67, and I got to admit I’m a little worried.  He did get stuck in China for a day (or more?  You there, Bunk?), and the last time he spoke he was asking us what he gets in return for Jaime forgetting his middle name.  (For the record, Bunk, Penny says “Oh… well… no, I don’t want to say what he’s owed.”)

– Yup, this is my father: The best link my dad sent this week was about a father in Germany who cut off another man’s nuts for dating his daughter.  “Just a father protecting his daughter,” says Alan.  (Dad)

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Weekly Update.

(WARNING: No naked chicks below.)

– Go Bowling: Virginia Tech will wear these orange helmets for the, uh… Orange Bowl:

Arizona will be wearing new blue helmets in the Alamo Bowl everyone is waiting for (you can just barely make out the red and white stripes on the helmet):  (Uni Watch)

– “6 foot 7 foot”: Eight foot bunch! (Bass drop.)  Who the fuck samples the “Banana Boat Song“?  Lil Wayne, that’s who.  His new song “6 foot 7 foot” is a banger and something I’d love to play in McCarthy’s car outside my parents’ shore house so my dad can call us assholes.  Again.  And women, if you were wondering how Lil Wayne would treat you, he promises “I never met the bitch, but I’d fuck her like I missed her.”  Romantic, no?  (Lil Wayne performed the song on SNL this week, and he surprisingly kept it clean.  Mostly.  More so than I’d expect out of Lil Wayne.  Good performance, too.)  (The World’s Best Ever)

– That’s real useful: Here’s a stupid video of a dog that can cross his eyes.  I’m just curious as to how the owner trained the dog to do it:  (The Daily What)

– Time-lapse: Here’s a time-lapse video of the snow removal job done for the University of Minnesota in preparation for Monday Night’s NFL game (Vikes/Bears).  (NFL PR Guy’s Twitter)

– Top ten: NY Times released their “Pop Top 10“.  Rick Ross has the album of the year while Waka Flocka Flame has the top song.  Taylor Swift and Justin Bieber make appearances as well, in case you thought it was rap.  (NY Times)

– LEDs and skateboards: It’s a cool concept from Buzzy Sullivan, surprised it hasn’t been done more:

Go here to see even more shots from this series.  (Tim Is Busy’s Twitter)

– Econ and Seinfeld: The “Economics of Seinfeld” is a real site that teaches economic concepts, like moral hazard, using scenes from Seinfeld.  (Carpe Diem)

– What does salvia do? Hopefully you’ve seen Miley Cyrus high as fuck after taking a bong rip, but just in case you doubt her drug of choice (her team swears it was salvia and not weed), science is here to help.  Some scientists conducted a study with four volunteers with experience in hallucinogens.  Here’s what they described:

As doses increased across sessions, volunteers reported stronger and stronger hallucinations, which included cartoonlike images, revisiting childhood memories and contact with an entity. “With this drug, at its peak intensity, people describe popping out and visiting a completely different world. Some people say it seems like another dimension or maybe the spirit world,” Johnson says. “They report these very profound experiences in these highly altered states of consciousness.”

Sign me up.  The scientists think salvia could be used for better pain treatment, as well as to help settle schizophrenics and those suffering from Alzheimer’s.  (Discovery News)

– Learn Flemish: Flemish is the name of the dialect for Dutch-speaking Belgians.  That’s not important.  What is important is that the most popular Flemish word in 2010 was “Tentsletje”, which means tent-slut.  To wit:

“The term “Tentsletje” is actually an official one, defined in Flemish dictionaries, as youth slang for “a girl on a festival meadow who has sexual intercourse with different men in her tent”.

The second most popular was “pedopriester”, which is exactly what you think it is.  (Dad)

– Boiling water in freezing temps: If it’s below freezing outside, then you should take some water and boil it.  Then open your door and throw that boiling water into the air.  This will happen:

– A shit transplant: In order to fight a deadly bacteria, C-diff, doctors are starting to take healthy people’s shit and shove it up sick people’s asses.  That previous sentence sounds way better than this one:

Now a small but growing number of doctors are trying a last-ditch treatment: Using good bacteria to fight off the bad by transplanting stool from a healthy person into the sick person’s colon.

I’m just curious how the body rejects a bad transplant in this scenario.  (Dad)

– Astro-ice: We already had astroturf, then fieldturf for grass sports, so why not a synthetic ice for hockey rinks?  It costs $599,000 to install, which beats the $1 million plus for a refrigeration unit.  The first full size rink was installed up in Canada, eh, by an aboriginal community in Fort Chipewyan.  (NY Times)

– The sky: Been awhile since I posted a space pic.  So here’s two stars merging:  (Discovery News)

– LA football stadium: AEG really wants to bring the NFL back to Los Angeles and has announced the three final designs for the stadium.  This one was done by Gensler (though I doubt ERK! helped):  (Sam Farmer’s Twitter)

– Tis the season: Head over to the Charities section to donate to a worthy cause.  If you have any others you think should be included, please email me.  As of this posting, these are the ones I have listed:

  • Children’s Specialized Hospital Foundation: Because ain’t it about the kids?  About | Donate
  • Harlem’s Children Zone: An outstanding project that has results.  About | Donate
  • The Branden Lombardi Foundation: A friend’s foundation that seeks to improve “the quality of life for cancer patients today.”  About | Donate
  • Shelter for the Homeless: For homeless in Fairfield County, Connecticut.  About | Donate
  • Hoboken Shelter: For homeless in Hoboken, Jersey.  About | Donate
  • YAI: Help the mentally disabled.  About | Donate
  • ASPCA: For your dogs, dawg.  About | Donate
  • Playing For Change: Using music to make a difference.  About | Donate
  • Project Wave Of Optimism: Help the surfing regions of Latin America. About | Donate
  • The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society: Usually you can sponsor someone in a run/marathon, but I’ve linked to their donation page.  About | Donate
  • Trees, Water, & People: Protect the environment, help the poor.  Birds meet stone.  About | Donate
  • Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center: Everybody knows someone who has or had cancer.  About | Donate
  • Kiva: Micro-economics, micro-lending, whatever you want to call it’s a good thing.  Make a profit while changing lives.  About | Loan
  • MDA: Help Jerry’s kids.  About | Donate
  • The Innocence Project: Help free the wrongly accused.  About | Donate
  • USA Cares: Help protect the people that risk their lives for you.  About | Donate
  • Jewish World Watch: Provides solar cookers to women in Darfur so the women don’t have to leave camp.  About | Donate
  • Children’s Tumor Foundation: Help children suffering from neurofibromatosis.  About | Donate

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Weekly Update.

– First things first: I’m sorry for skipping a week.  I have valid excuses, but you don’t want to hear about them.  This is for the week ending December 11, 2010, for reference.

– Changing lives: This article praising Terrell Thomas had a picture of Will Blackmon instead.  I shot a tweet to its author (Ross Miles) and it got fixed.  So yeah, my contribution to the Internet.  What have you ever done?  (I just deleted a paragraph boring you about my all-defense fantasy team, which you don’t care about.)  (Pro Football Focus)

– Masked robber: Remember that old Asian dude who wasn’t old, he was just wearing a really good old man mask?  Well someone else was using a really good black male mask and robbing banks.  The police arrested an innocent black man, but it wasn’t racist because even his own mother thought it was her son in surveillance footage.  Really.  (Gizmodo)

– Flexible tech and Reebok: This past weekend my dad and I were freezing our asses off and talking about the future of cold-weather gear.  We figured that eventually you would only wear one layer, but at the least we should have “smart” clothing.  Like clothing that heats and cools after reading your body temp via sensors.  Well, this week Reebok announced a partnership with a “flexible tech” startup company, MC10.  The goal is to make clothing embedded with electronics.  What those electronics will do, we don’t know yet.  But I do like being right.  (Engadget)

– The eyes are watching: Apparently “[b]eing watched by a photograph of staring eyes can be enough encouragement to behave, follow orders or do the right thing.”  According to a study, putting a set of instructions (throw your trash out) with a “picture of staring eyes” made more people follow the order than those given the instructions with a picture of flowers.  So if you’re painting your kid’s room, you might want to think about two eyes.  “Good night!  And don’t forget the eyes see everything, Timmy.”  (Wired)

– Longshot: The U.S. Navy will soon be using a railgun that can hit targets up to 100 miles away.  With “perfect accuracy.”  Go here to watch a big gun go boom.  (They expect these on ships by 2025.)  (Gizmodo)

– Make hot chicks make music: Go to this site to play a piano of lingerie models, aka the Cup Size Choir.  Here’s the ad to entice you:  (The World’s Best Ever)

– KFC in Africa: Execs at Yum Brands Inc. believe Africa is their “next international jewel.” They want to double their restaurants to 1,200 by 2014.  (Wooten)

– Let’s get physical: Physical contact improves team performance.”  Great, now every pederast coach can say they were just trying to win.  (NY Times)

– Mythbusters: El Prsidente was on Mythbuster’s this week, here’s the video:

I keed, I keed.  He was there to tell Jamie and Adam to re-do the Archimedes’ Mirror myth, which still came up busted.  So don’t try grabbing 500 mirrors and expect an advancing boat to catch on fire, but you may end up distracting the soldiers on-board.  Also, Hellboy would not have been able to flip a car with his fist.  Sorry.  (video, Wooten).

– Design awards: IDSA and Teague have announced various awards for industrial design.  The award for “Most Profitable Solution to a Business Problem” went to Gilette’s Venus razor, and I found that interesting.  Amazon’s Kindle won for “Design Thinking’s Contribution to Business”… whatever that means.  (Core77)

– Shay Laren: You know this girl as the “bouncing tits while she puts on her jeans” girl:

The guys at Kissing Suzy Kolber point out that the above is from the below video:

And I’d like to point you to this pic of her:  (Kissing Suzy Kolber)

 

– Britney the bartender: Go to The Hog Pit to see this chick pour drinks:

(I’m not sure who to credit on this.  Drunk dude at bar that leaned in to tell us, I guess.)

– Teva high-heels: You know, for that stylish hiker: (Geekologie)

– Q Magazine’s Top 50 Albums of 2010: I’m terrible with new music, as there wasn’t an album I’ve listened to on here until #36 (The Roots’ How I Got Over).  See the rest of the list here.  (Ces)

– Best ripping of Not-A-Wikileaks: TechCrunch’s Paul Carr explains why he hates what Julian Assange is doing.  (Boing Boing)

– The best (worst?) keying ever: For legality’s sake, I’m not saying who sent these to me, who’s car this is, or who allegedly did it.  I will say that it is surprising:

That says “I [heart] cock”.

I think the windshield and windows getting keyed are what really push this over.  Look how thick the lines on the hood are.  Is that a screwdriver?

– Yup, this is my father: Two links my dad sent me this week, of many, were two women who hid stolen goods in their fat rolls, and this “routine police stop” (his words):  (Dad)

-Why I love free market capitalism: Watch this video showing life expectancy and income levels over the past two-hundred years:  (Carpe Diem)

– Gylne Tider: I’ve never heard of this Norwegian television series, but apparently three Norwegians travel to meet their childhood heroes.  This “Let It Be” ad for the newest season went viral:  (Montague)

– Read: I’ve updated this section of the site, adding books Worth Dying For, The Snowman, and StoriesWorth Dying For is a Jack Reacher novel, and features some solid killings.  The Snowman follows detective Harry Hole in Norway tracking down a serial killer, and has some intricate killings.  Stories is a compilation of, yup, stories, edited by Neil Gaiman.  You should read the introduction by Gaiman for Stories, it’s a great look into why he writes (I’ll spoil it for you, it’s because he loves hearing the question “and then what happened?”).  And I really need to pick my game up, only thirteen books read by my count since January 28th.  Piss poor, Blake, piss poor.

– The Marks’ Financial Update:

  • MAB – Bunk was slightly down these past two weeks, starting at $14.03 and closing at $13.67.  Fitting since his Moonti season is over and he didn’t make the playoffs.  Also, he put up his worst win total since the inception of the league.  But hey, some things are more important than fake football.  Right, Bunk?
  • MDH – Harter was up for the time period, starting at $2.29 and closing at $2.32, but between those two numbers was a fun ride from $2.24 to $2.44 in one day, with a soft slide back down to $2.32 in two days.  Although Harter is up from his June 30th low of $1.75, he hasn’t made it easy on investors with his volatility.  Or his stealing cigarettes.
  • MFL – It was a steady fall for Mark from $13.65 to $12.59, and being “thanksful” for Michael Vick certainly did not help.  Well, it didn’t help making friends in life, but it certainly helped him secure a playoff birth.  Mark’s actually having a tough close to the year, falling from $14.32 on November 2nd, to his current $12.59 price.  Last time it was this rough he bounced back after a night at Makos.  And really, you shouldn’t ask what Mako’s is, you should already know:

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