Weekly Update.

(WARNING: No naked chicks nor editing below.  Also, I can’t say this is my best update of all time.)

– How to keep track of fantasy football on your iPhone: There’s no need to use an app for your fantasy team if you are just checking scores.  The best, fastest, and most energy efficient way is to load up different pages in Safari with the games/leagues you are in.  The pages will load faster than the app will, and then you won’t have to go through a menu to get to your game.  This works just as well with real games, too.  (I’m unfamiliar with Android phones, but I assume the same applies, as long as you can open different pages.)  I recommend taking some time to get each page loaded up before games start, then just open up the web and once the page loads you’ll have the most up-to-date score.  So that’s my fantasy tip… anyone wanna help me get a decent receiver?

– We care about nothing, Lebowski: Supposedly people think Progressives are nihilists.  I’ve never actually heard this opinion, but Conor Williams, a PhD candidate at Georgetown, decided to write an essay defending Progressives.  You want to “defend” Progressives?  Then explain why they use government as a solution to everything.  (Arts & Letters Daily)

– Economics in the NFL: In 2009, 62.4% of the money earned by players went to the top 20%, up from the 56.3% they took in 2000.  According to a lot of smart people, this should be a bad thing because income inequality is bad for society.  So what happened over the past 10 years?  The top players make more, the average player makes more, and, because this is what happens when the pie increases, the bottom players make more.  And I’m still waiting to hear what significance “income inequality” has.  (The Enterprise Blog)

– High-speed videos of insects: Go here to watch insects take flight, though a failure or two are captured.  (Wired)

– iPad on your forearm: Got an iPad?  Then maybe you should get this:  (The Daily What)

– The Duke “Fuck List”: Some Dookie named Karen Owen put together a PowerPoint presentation for her friends about which athletes were the best to fuck at Dook.  Deadspin and Jezebel both had features, but random site Thoughts From a Fat White Guy had the presentation in full.  (Deadspin)

– Carstache: The dumbest thing you can do to your car:  (Jimmy)

– Cheap imports are good: We should not be telling China to raise its currency, especially since all that would do is raise prices in America, which I’m sure our poor would love.  (Carpe Diem)

– Beer made for space: Astronauts4hire, a non-profit research group, is testing beer brewed for microgravity so that when you’re floating in space you can still get your drank on.  (PopSci)

– Pay more taxes: If you want the Bush Tax Cuts to expire, or you think people should pay more in taxes, do us all a favor and go donate to the United States.  Then maybe NYC can afford the $27.5 million charge for changing the font on street signs just because the Feds say so.  (Carpe Diem)

– Connecticut Whale: Hartford is bringing back the Whalers… kinda.  Not really, they’re just renaming the Hartford Wolfpack.  Here’s the new logo, and it sucks:  (Wooten)

– This Ain’t Avatar XXX 3D: That’s the name of the porn parody (pornady?) of Avatar, available now from Hustler Video.  (Gizmodo)

– Blackberry Playbook: You don’t really care about Research In Motion’s iPad knock-off, but your company might.  It has all the security/sync-up features of a Blackberry, except in a pseudo-iPad.  Everything you need to know is right here.  (Fast Company)

– Birds: Take a look at this picture:

Can you name the differences in the birds?  Did you say none?  Then kudos to you.  Here’s the same birds on a white background.  (Carpe Diem)

– The Marks’ Financial Update:

• MFL – Congrats to the worst performing Mark this period as he went from $14.84 on the 20th to close out last week at $14.65.  He started off low and kinda stayed low with a couple small itty-bitty-titty-committee-esque bumps along the way.
• MAB – Bunk had a tough time, dropping from $15.20 on September 20th to $15.06 on the 29th.  He bounced back up the next day from his low and ended the two-week period at $15.16.  Since he kicked my ass in the Moonti league, he’ll be happy to know that he was up $0.14 to $15.30 on Monday.
• MDH – While his chart wasn’t flat, Harter pretty much was since he only went up 1 cent from $2.58 to $2.59.  He got as low as $2.46 and as high as $2.60, giving him an increase of 10 cents for the month of September.  Way to go, I guess.