Weekly Update.

(Updated list of charities 12/19)

– Boxing: Vic Darchinyan knocked Tomas Rojas the fuck out (7:40 in, though 7:45 is when you hear Gus Johnson say “OOOOOHH”).  No, you don’t have to know these people, but Vic is a pretty big puncher for super flyweight.

• Sorry for telling you to watch Vitali last week, he didn’t get the knockout though it’s not his fault that Kevin Johnson was too scared to really fight.
• Malignaggi, who I hate as a boxer but love as a personality, beat Juan Diaz in their rematch.  After the fight Paulie said about Hatton that he “would beat Hatton more easily than he beat me” in reference to Hatton’s TKO of Malignaggi back in 2008 (so two thousand and late).
• HBO and Shotime’s years have come to an end.  Watch HBO’s top fights of the year starting December 26th with Floyd Mayweather Jr vs Juan Manuel Marquez (consensus #2 pound-for-pound fighter before that fight, keep that in mind when Floyd lands 59% of his punches to Marquez’s 12%).
• January is already good – we get to watch Juan Manuel Lopez (JuanMa) on the same card as Yuriorkis Gamboa (you will not be saying “who??” by the end of 2010) at The Garden on the 23rd.  Then Shane Mosley fights my third favorite active fighter in Andre Berto on the 30th.  (We’ll get to Berto in later updates)
• Kelly Pavlik fights a bum in Youngstown, Ohio on Saturday.  Pavlik was supposed to fight Paul Williams last week but claimed the staph infection on his hand prevented him from training.  “But Kelly,” you ask, “you’re fighting a week after the original one was scheduled?”  Yeah.

– Greece taxes the shit out of shit: Wish it was actually manure, but no, 90% tax rate on bankers’ bonuses instead. (zero hedge)

– Quadriplegic blows a tube to shoot a shotgun: If you were a friend of his, you would crack “blowjob” jokes, right?  Just me?  Of course this was found in an English paper.  Brits must loves. (Gizmodo)

– The Year of the Political Jackass: David Paul Kuhn makes a great point here. Then wonders what a conference call with Obama, Jong-Il, and Ahmadinejad would sound like. (RealClearPolitics)

– Flexible flash memory to come: The Unversity of Tokyo already started bending OLED earlier this year, now they’ve tackled flash memory.  Just imagine a smaller, thinner iPhone (ugh, or Droid) in your hand… or around your wrist. An iFanny perhaps? (Engadget)

– Hey, wanna watch a volcano erupt underwater? Of course you do (Gizmodo):

– Now see how insignificant that volcano is: On a universal scale, at least.  Found this video on a site named “Geekologie”.  (Blake’s Update – summarizing shitty nerd sites so you don’t have to!)

– Sigourney Weaver does “Planet Earth” for “Avatar”: Look, the plot/story/acting/etc probably sucks.  But I know at some point in the near future I’ll be sitting in an IMAX 3-D theater enjoying the movie.  It just looks… beautiful.  (Wired)

– Gizmodo brings back the “Wassup” Commercial: Worth linking to.  Come on, you laughed then and you’ll laugh now. (Gizmodo)

– Sean Trende explains why the “Health Care Bill Is Political Suicide”: His point is that you’re gonna lose the independents and moderates and he uses stats from the last two elections to explain. (RealClearPolitics)

– Paramount to open video clip site: You’ll get to chop down a movie to your favorite scene, then pay to save it.  Like a ringtone for movies.  Check the site out at www.inscene.com. (NYTimes)

– Kids In The Hall return: Um, no U.S. airdates for “Death Comes To Town“.  Maybe you don’t like them, but I still will play “Nobody’s Home” and still crush people’s heads.  So I’m pumped. (Ben)

– The Copenhagen climate talks will leave the biggest carbon footprint ever: And no, the majority of the 46,200 tons of carbon dioxide spewed out into the air is not from their dumb ideas.  But hey, nice bike.  (Reuters; bike from Gizmodo)

– Jermichael Finley’s jersey is all fucked up: And Paul Lukas, aka Uni Watch, wonders if a unitard will replace the football uniform (yeah, he’s as disgusted with that thought as you).  (Uni Watch):

– No, Bunk, this guy is not the modern day Rosa Parks:

– TLC has a new show called “Little Chocolatiers”: It’s about little people making chocolates.  Here’s a clip.  Sorry, too easy.  Here’s a real clip where they acknowledge you’re thinking about the Oompa Loompas.

– D’Angelo Barksdale lives: Though he’s still in high school.  The rumor is Muhlenberg is looking at him (sorry Mark Lee, not really). (Bill Simmons)

– ‘Tis the season: I asked a few of you for any charities you liked, and well, you had some.  I was going to title this “Blake’s Attempt To Not End Up In Hell”:

• Children’s Specialized Hospital Foundation: Because ain’t it about the kids?  About | Donate
• Shelter for the Homeless: For homeless in Fairfield County, Connecticut.  About | Donate
• Hoboken Shelter: For homeless in Hoboken, Jersey.  About | Donate
• YAI: Help the mentally disabled.  About | Donate
• ASPCA: For your dogs, dawg.  About | Donate
• Playing For Change: Using music to make a difference.  About | Donate
• Project Wave Of Optimism: Help the surfing regions of Latin America. About | Donate
• The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society: Usually you can sponsor someone in a run/marathon, but I’ve linked to their donation page.  About | Donate
• Trees, Water, & People: Protect the environment, help the poor.  Birds meet stone.  About | Donate
• Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center: Everybody knows someone who has or had cancer.  About | Donate
• Kiva: Micro-economics, micro-lending, whatever you want to call it’s a good thing.  Make a profit while changing lives.  About | Loan
• MDA: Help Jerry’s kids.  About | Donate
• The Innocence Project: Help free the wrongly accused.  About | Donate

(I know I missed some so please email blakesupdate@gmail.com or make a comment below and I’ll update the post.  Seriously, I don’t want to go to hell.)

– Twitter Update: Blake has 24 followers (still unchanged, lost and gained some). The only RT I got was Woo doing promotion for me and Bardon was the only one to mention me.  Oy.

– Tweet of the Week: The Onion (TheOnion) was running down the top quotes of all time:

“‘Let’s just see what this iceberg wants.’ -Edward Smith, captain of the Titanic”

– What you missed: Mythbusters.  I know, it’s a nerdy show.  Whatever.  Here’s how to watch it: Record the later showing, usually at 11pm, and don’t watch it until it’s done recording.  Watch the first 30 seconds as they explain the myths they’ll look at.  Shit you don’t care about?  Delete and done.  Fast forward until they explain how they’ll test.  This is key, if you hear the words “explosion” or “destroy” stay tuned.  Next you fast forward to when they execute the test (this week they drove a car towards a lake – that’s worth watching; they swabbed a bunch of soda cans – fast forward).  Always remember that the Mythbusters don’t just bust the myth, they also replicate.  So that’s why: you won’t find rat pee on your soda can; your toilet seat is cleaner than your keyboard, money, and kitchen sink; you should go 100mph when skipping your Lambo’ across a 100 ft pond (also don’t use a ramp, just drive straight at it).

– What I missed: So Paulie Jr left OCC?  Anyone watch “American Chopper” anymore?  Maybe it doesn’t count since no one does, but I didn’t know Mikey was in rehab, Paulie Jr started his own design company then plastered his logo all over a pickup truck, and the show now sucks even more.